Life has been on the down low lately. Though I don’t show it at school or at the hospital, whenever I come home and change into my clothes and lie on my bed, I fight the urge to cry every time. Emotions keep on pouring in and I don’t even know where they are coming from. Maybe it’s the stress? But I’m not that stressed out these days so I don’t even know anymore. In all honesty, life has been great. It had its worst days but I’m still living & breathing smiles & laughs yet somehow, there’s still that pulsating thought of sadness, longing & even self-pity. I did cry last night, I didn’t know what else to do and when I was done I distracted myself with movies and waited for a calm mind.
For today, I didn’t cry. I started my day right, I think. When I woke up at 8:30, I got my frozen blueberries & strawberries and blitzed them all in a blender with some almond milk. I wasn’t planning on taking a picture but since it has been a while since I had posted a smoothie bowl on my Instagram (@beyscapades), I got some granola and sprinkled some on top. I have been lacking staples on my pantry (chia seeds, flax seeds, almond butter, coconut flakes, cacao nibs etc.) but since I had a box of Ferrero Rocher on our fridge, I decided why the hell not put some hazelnutty goodness next to my granola. Though not the healthiest topping, it was still good. Chocolates does complement berries. Honestly, making the smoothie made me feel quite whole. It was an activity that I did enjoy doing and it was worth making it and eating it.